Monday, March 21, 2016

Kink & Feminism - Can't We All Just Get Along?

This is a good read that reminds us why we need kinky feminists to exist.

What too many feminists and kinksters forget is that feminism and kink make more sense together than they do apart. That, for all the times they butt heads, they both get better by asking the other to be better.

So much of the emphasis on consent-culture in kink comes from the feminist movement seeking to to move away from often problematic fantasies into a more functional and healthy reality. Intersectionality asks us to think carefully about how we express many of our kinks, particularly when it comes to play involving race, gender, and other minorities. We process and participate in our kinks better because of a lot of the work done by feminists. We are healthier and happier and are often better protected because of that work.

And so much of the sex-positivity and body-positivity movements are  fueled by kinky women, women who, by virtue of who they naturally are, break social norms by critically thinking about their bodies and realizing their own desires. Who, because they've had to take closer looks at things like power exchange and gender dynamics in order to do what they do, have unique perspectives on those topics that are still too often discounted when they should be invited and encouraged. Because so many of our beliefs are backed by real-life struggles, both internal and external, with understanding power and place that is uniquely ours.

We--both feminists and kinksters, not to mention all of us who identify as both--do better when we listen to each other. When we actually try to understand each other. To see when and where we can learn from each other. Where our paths cross and where we still need work to come together.

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