The (Not-So) Fatal Erotic Blow

“Sex is not a thing you do; it’s a place you go.”

There really is a lot about this talk that I absolutely love. 

It's the thing that I think imaginative people--kinky or vanilla (though the more imaginative you are, the more kinks you tend to accumulate)--get so well. Great sex is so much less about what you do--the toys you use or the roles you play or the positions you contort yourself into--it's about getting yourself there. About going to places you can't in your normal, everyday life. It's a suspension of reality. It's getting lost in the scene. It is the ultimate escape.

The mind--the will and willingness of a person--is so much more sexually relevant and powerful than the penis or the clit. It's why spanking can be sexy. It's why the act of crossdressing can be hot. It's why the utterly incongruent act of sexual denial can be ridiculously arousing. Because the sexual space--so much more than any act--is what defines sex.